Today has just been one of those days. I haven't had one of these days since my daughter was a newborn. Some days are just harder than others. For one, Eisley's sleep schedule has been all kinds of messed up lately. I couldn't tell you why. Let's just go with teething/growth spurt/developmental milestone and whatever else you can think to throw in there. Nighttime isn't too bad. She still wakes up once (sometimes twice) a night to eat and usually a couple other times for her pacifier. Lately, she's decided that naps are for losers and she would rather stay up all day BUT periodically be super cranky.
So today, I cried. Our routine is to go in her room, turn on her sound machine and sway/rock until she EVENTUALLY falls asleep. I know it's a lot of work on my part and I most likely made her the sweet little monster she is today, but this is our life now. She just wouldn't fall asleep in my arms. I became more frustrated and then I just started crying. I didn't know what to do anymore. I was exhausted. So we just got in the car and drove. I drove all around the city and she finally fell asleep for 20 minutes. I cried most of the trip.
I felt like such a failure. Why am I crying? It makes sense to break down when you have this brand new baby whom you don't know yet and you haven't grown into your new mommy shoes. But I've known this girl for 7 months! Shouldn't I know exactly what to do 100% of the time? Of course not! I'm human. It doesn't make me a bad mom. I'm just a mom. A normal mom who shouldn't feel ashamed for feeling beat down from time to time.
On a completely random opposite note, she did start doing the cutest thing today. She's become obsessed with biting our noses. Sound weird, I know but it's actually pretty adorable. She was chewing on Craig's nose before he went to work and then the rest of the evening every time she was close to my face, she would grab both sides of my face and latch onto my nose. Oh this girl. She's a crazy, cute, rotten little stinker. And I'm madly in love with her. Even if she never takes another nap again... :/
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